If you could go back and change one event in your life (or un-say one thing you wish you'd never said), what would you choose, and why?
At first I thought I couldn't pick a single thing that I would do differently If I could go back and change only one thing in my life, but thinking about it I have narrowed it to one - I wish that I would have ended it with the guy I was trying to date two summers ago. I wish that I would have followed my mind and 'left'; I wish I would have told him it's over. It was ssoo complicated and there was so many times I had to convince myself that he really gave a $h*t about me. If I would have been strong enough to push him maybe he would have given me enough to end it and say f* it I deserve better than your lies, uncertainty and BS. The saddest thing about all of it is that I really truly enjoyed being around him - we liked the same music and he was just easy to be with and laugh with. Now I don't even know what to think anymore and maybe it's better that way.
I know that everything happens for a reason and I guess he (and guys like him) was just something I needed to 'get out of my system' or so to speak. I would never change us 'happening'; I'd just change how it ended. I'd rather look back on it and feel strong and like the me I know then look back and wonder what the _ _ _ _ I was doing. As anyone of my HS crew can attest to I've been through enough drama to know better in college but as one of my bestest friends once told me "you went away to college and it happened all over again" (or something to that effect).
... I knew better ... I should have walked away ...
Regardless it all worked out for the best really - I now have the most amazing BF ever and if I had to go through it all over just to have him it would make the drinking and dumb decisions worth it. My friends love him, my family adores him and I, of course, couldn't imagine better arms to be wrapped up in, lips to kiss, and voice to hear "I love you". I found the one guy who's proven to me that they are not all the same and as long as he wants me I'll never let him go.